You Can Be In My Dream

We Drink and Drink and Drink and Drink and Fight and Fight and Fight and Fight

Happy St. Patrick's Day from my bowl of Apple Jacks to you.

Spam Eggs Bacon and Spam

I gave my car a sno-hawk.

I'm never going back to my old school.

Fun Fact: the band Steely Dan was named after a steam-powered dildo. And speaking of dildos, I'm done being financially ass-raped from the future by ITT. ¡No más!

If you ever feel the urge to enroll at ITT Technical Institute, fight it. Not nearly enough of the vast amounts of money they leech out of students seems to make it into financing the long overdue upgrades of their equipment, and the credits aren't transferrable to anywhere except another ITT. Some of the instructors at the Greenfield, Wisconsin, campus are alright, though. Speaking of school, last night I ran into a familiar face from long ago. It was a weird night overall. Niether of us were supposed to be there. And then there were these two other people trying to get me to dance. One of them said to me, "Are you the one?" Seriously. I was like, "Yeah, this is the Matrix, I'm Neo, and there is no spoon. Now take me to Monica Bellucci." I guess sometimes Friday the 13th really can be a bizarre ride to the far side.

We could almost buy our own ship for that.

As it turns out, coming up with a new nerd reference every week isn't as easy as it sounds, even for me. But tonight I had a good'un. I nearly got kicked out of school for not acquiring a certain number of credits within a certain amount of time, so they put me on this probationary deal where I had to pay my own way through one quarter. If I passed that quarter's classes, I would be allowed to continue my education within ITT's hallowed halls. Well the quarter came and went. I passed Math 2 and Composition 2 with average scores, and I never once received a bill for services rendered, even after requesting one on three separate occasions. Funny thing is, the money that I owed had to come out of the wad of cash I'd stashed away for the new computer, and there came a time when I decided, fuck it, they don't seem to want my money, so I'll spend it on something fun. The day after my computer parts arrived, I got a call from ITT's financial aid department. Great timing, fuckheads. Anyway, tonight I paid what I had left in savings toward this one quarter of boring, useless classes. So that's the usual rambling back story. The young lady in Financial Aid asked me how much I could pay right now, and I answered, "I can pay you two thousand now, plus fifteen when we reach Alderaan." It was worth it just to see her expression of OMG transform into WTF and finally LOL. She also wanted to know what emergency came up that I had to spend $3,200+ on something other than school. I told her I spent it all on hookers and booze. That's not a nerd reference. I was just being a jackass. As usual.

He shall know your ways as if born to them.

I've been pretty inactive blog-wise since Superman Returns came out, but I've hit upon a new gimmick to break the silence. I will make at least one nerdly reference each week, and you will read about it with rapt attention. This week, while catching up in my Math 2 homework with a little tutoring from the instructor, I figured out on my own an "easy" formula for calculating the sum of a given number sequence. The instructor was pleasantly surprised by this, considering that we hadn't yet covered it in class and I sure as hell hadn't been reading ahead. "How did you know how to do that?" he asked. I responded, "It seemed the proper way." (If you laughed at the above story, then kudos to you. If, however, you laughed and then thought to yourself, "Again, it is the legend," then you should give some serious thought to moving out of your parents' basement. Finally, if you said it aloud, then there is no hope for you, and I wish you the best of luck.)

I was a busy boy in 1993.

Between struggling through my junior year of high school, creating comic strips for the school paper, developing my meager talents as a poet, and coping with my parents divorce, it's a miracle I had any time left to work on Lois & Clark.

The Cinema Show

Watch my student films: Rock the Dead Godzillamp "Superman Returns" mock opening credits Les Mortes Du Le Monde

"I never drink when I fly."

Vote Zod

http://www.zod2008.com